In need of a Saviour too

I drove past a sign the other day:

My first thought was: “who can disagree with that?” Then, thinking further, it's also a statement that is nearly impossible to agree with! At least, any number of people might agree with the statement, without agreeing with each other. Do we all agree on what the “positive direction” is?

I want to make a case that:

• There is only one positive direction for our children (and indeed for all of us): to God through Jesus Christ. 
• As parents, we will be held to account for our leadership of our children – either toward or away from Jesus. 
• As a church, it is a vital part of our mercy mission to help parents discharge this duty, and to help children start in the right direction. 

One positive direction

All people are in terrible danger. All people are at risk of great judgement, wrath and punishment. All people are rebels against God, trying to wriggle out from His rightful authority and establish their own rule in God's place. Paul puts it succinctly in Romans 3:23:

for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.

But surely this doesn't apply to children! Children are so innocent, so trusting, so good. Surely Paul is only talking about grown-ups? This is a tempting objection, because it plays to closely held cultural values about childhood. But to accept it requires us to ignore the plain language Paul uses here and elsewhere in Romans (eg. 3:9-18). It also requires us to ignore the consistent teaching of the bible elsewhere. Here is one example from Psalm 51:

Surely I was sinful at birth,
sinful from the time my mother conceived me. (v. 5)

If David, a man whose heart was fully devoted to the Lord, can write this, then it is clear that the description applies generally to all people.

So children are alienated from God, just as adults are. They too are “without hope and without God in the world” (Eph 2:12), unless they too are “brought near through the blood of Christ” (Eph 2:13).

Society and the church have too often been satisfied with the lesser benefit of keeping a child out of trouble. As long as a child or teen doesn't get arrested, get drunk, or have a child out of wedlock, we think that the child is turning out OK – the more so if a child makes some positive contribution through music, sport, work or school. We have seen already that this obscures a child's separation from God, and his or her great need to be saved!

The remedy, the only “positive direction”, is to hear and believe the gospel – to trust in the person that gospel proclaims! As Paul wrote: “I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes.” (Romans 1:16) And Peter proclaimed: “Salvation is found in no-one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to men by which we must be saved.” (Acts 4:12).

The instruction of the Lord

Parents bear a heavy burden in ensuring that their children have a chance to hear the gospel and respond. This is clear common sense – who else spends as much time with a child as a parent? Who else is the child's first and most important role model? Whose words sink deepest into a child's heart, and exert the greatest influence over the person that child grows to be?

The bible emphasises this common-sense conclusion with a command and a warning. The command we see in Ephesians 6:4: “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” The warning is implicit in Mark 9:42: “And if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone tied around his neck.” Jesus said this while holding a little child (see verse 36), which adds a sharp edge to his words!

So parents are charged with the responsibility of bringing their children up in the Lord, and are warned not to be the cause of sin in their lives! Not something to take lightly.

But is this too much to put on parents? Don't children themselves bear some responsibility? And what about the church, doesn't the church have to reach out to children as well?

Firstly, the responsibility of children. Of course, they must make their own response to Jesus in due course. But this does not absolve parents of their responsibility. As Paul writes in Romans 10:14:

“How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them?”

What's more, the capacity to believe in Jesus is itself a God-given gift, outside the control of the parents: “It is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God” (Eph 2:8). We rightly celebrate God's greatness and goodness whenever anyone turns to Christ and is saved!

Parents are not responsible for results – they are responsible for their own obedience in presenting the gospel to their kids.

Where does the church fit in?

Secondly, the role of the church. There are two main jobs for the church in this area:

• Preparing God's people for works of service (Eph 4:12), particularly preparing parents for the task of leading their children towards Christ! 
• Going into the world to make disciples (Matt 28:19) – including of children and particularly of those children who will not hear of Jesus from their parents! 

We must do these things because God has commanded them. But aside from that, it is good sense to reach out to children and to parents of children. People become more set in their ways as they grow older. Reaching children when they are still young gives them the greatest opportunity to respond positively to Jesus, relatively free from the prejudices and attitudes that harden as they grown older. Twelve seems to be the crucial age. We need to be showing primary-school aged children the wonder and glory of God, and inviting them to accept Jesus as Saviour and King!

Love your neighbour as yourself

I was reading this post on the blog Stuff Christians Like the other day.

(For those who have stayed with me and not been distracted by Jon's great blog - thank you both.)  

Image: 'The Good Samaritan' by Chinese artist
Dr He Qi as found at He Qi Gallery. 

Anyway, the gist of the thing is that Christians like to pride themselves on being loving, especially to non-Christians.  It's kinda our thing.  We all know bits of 1 Corinthians 13 (Love is patient, love is kind, love is not love which alters when it alteration finds, - or something like that).  We remember three of the four characters in the parable of the good samaritan (there were the levis, the guy who got robbed, the samaritan and the ... other unhelpful bloke).  And we're really good at the "by this shall all men know that you are my disciples, if you have love one for another."  Someone even wrote a song.

Problem is, as Jon pointed out on his blog, most of our love and service is directed inwards toward other Christians.  In our enthusiasm for the Great Commission, we oftentimes forget the Great Commandment.  Don't get me wrong, we should be loving other Christians (and let's face it, who would want to join the church if we didn't?), but when I look searchingly at my own behaviour, I see a worrying pattern - I spend very little of my time with non-Christians, and almost no social time with non-Christians.

We know that love is not primarily a feeling (like I discussed here), but rather an intentional action to work for the good of another.  If that is true, then one implication is the need to spend time with that other person.  If I don't, how can I be acting for their good?  Examine yourself - am I all alone here in my insulated personal Christendom, or are you nodding along?

It's about here that I'm meant to start making a whole lot of resolutions about inviting non-Christian co-workers, neighbours and school parents to barbecues - in fact I did in my head, before another thought occurred to me:

How will my children learn to love their non-Christian neighbour unless they see me doing it? 

My children get lots of time with their non-Christian friends - they go to a State primary school.  But how will they learn to be a Christian person in a non-Christian setting, rather than a chameleon that can adapt rapidly between church and school circles?

First and foremost, my trust is in God, that through greater knowledge of his Son, and through the gift of the Holy Spirit, my children will learn to look beyond themselves, their family and their church to the needs of the world.  I know that these lessons will not be downloaded Matrix-style to their minds, but that God will use people (primarily me and my wife!) as instruments to teach them.

So here are the thoughts that occurred to me - perhaps you have other ideas that you could contribute in the comments:

Incidental ideas:

• We've started praying each night and (when we have time) each morning, that the Holy Spirit would be with the children through the day, and that they would be good representatives of Jesus;
• We try to open our home to their friends for play dates, and then be present while the kids are eating and playing together;
• Do you do school pick up? Make time to chat to other kids and parents, or to keep kids company whose parents are late or need to meet with teachers;
• Volunteer in your child's classroom, music group, sports team, dance class, and look for opportunities to serve and to explain to your children why you do it;
• I really do need to invite the families of their friends over for a meal!

More structured ideas:

• For older kids, could they get involved in a family or church activity that is run for the benefit of others? Like landscaping the school, or shopping for a housebound neighbour, or inviting the migrant family for a meal and regular English conversation, or volunteering with City Mission, Salvos or Anglicare?
• Pick a cause - national or international - that demonstrates Christian love, and encourage the kids to learn about it and think how to support it.  It might be something like Samaritan's Purse "Operation Christmas Child", or sponsoring a child overseas, or supporting the work of the Leprosy Mission.